Tuesday, April 24, 2012

It was so bad, it was good

This morning I got up right as my alarm went off, changed into my running clothes, put my watch on and was out the door in less than 10 minutes. It was about 55 degrees and already sunny at 6 am. By the time I  finished at 7 it was 65 degrees and really sunny!

I'm not going to lie, it wasn't that great of a run. I just couldn't get into my groove, my legs felt like bricks, I was having trouble controlling my breathing and I had stomach problems from the get-go. I ran my scheduled 5 miles without stopping to walk but man...I wanted to give up about halfway through. I kept thinking "Why am I even doing this?", "It wont matter if I just skip/cut short this one run", "I just wanna be back in bed, why did I decide to get up early and do this?", "Maybe I'm not gonna do as well during the half as I thought...I can hardly run 5 miles without wanting to give up", "Obviously I'm doing everything all wrong because I'm not losing any weight anymore. I should just stop"

Yep...I'm not proud of it at all. Major negativity. I'm not even sure why. Usually running relaxes me and clears my mind. Today, it did the opposite. I hate that I let ONE bad run make me feel like a failure. I'm NOT a failure. Everyone has bad runs (ha ha) and its just part of the game- deal with it and move on. Why is it so much easier to type that all out than to actually believe it?!

By about mile 4.5 I had sort of had an attitude change, but not completely. I was still having a really rough run. I was SO relieved when I saw 5.0 on my watch so that I could stop and walk the rest of the way home (only about .25 miles). After I stopped running- I felt great! My legs were warmed up and felt really strong/well-worked, I caught my breath immediately and I had that awesome after-run glow going on. It only took me a few minutes to un-do all that negative self-talk and realize it wasn't one of my better runs- it was still A RUN and I still burned 650 calories, started my day with a workout like I had planned and was still going to be able to benefit from all the post-workout endorphins for the rest of the day. Its kind of funny how my whole attitude did a 180 in that short quarter of a mile walk :)

(side note: I got a runners waist/hip pack and I can't decide how to wear it- picture 1: behind me. picture 2: in front. I wore it in the back today (holding my phone, keys and GU) and it didn't bother me at all, besides hearing the zipper bounce around)
I walked in the door a few minutes after 7:00, just in time to get Austin ready for school. Much to my surprise- he was up, dressed, teeth brushed and breakfast eaten and was playing in the playroom! Ummmm...AMAZING! haha that never, ever happens. I usually have to drag him out of bed and hassle with him for 30 minutes to get ready. This was a huge deal and made my day start off even better. I got him to school and Carson and I came home to do our morning chores (breakfast, dishes, make beds, start laundry, etc). It's only 10:40 and I've got everything on my to-do list crossed off. LOVE IT! Austin gets out early so we're going to walk to pick him up (about a 2 mile round trip walk) and then come home to put them down for naps. I do believe Im going to rest on the couch and watch a girly movie this afternoon!

P.S. If you are getting tired of my self-portraits...sorry! I'm doing Project 365 where you take a picture of the same thing everyday (flowers, trees, your kids, the sky, yourself, etc) and I feel like a picture-less blog post is kind of boring- so I just throw these in :) I'm going to try to start using my  point-and-shoot more since my DSLR is way to big to lug around everywhere. Its just easier to post picures directly from my phone :)

Tomorrow and Thursday I'm subbing in my son's Kindergarten class so I won't be running in the early morning. I'm going to do the elliptical tomorrow night after church and then I'll do my last 5 mile run of the week on Thursday night after dinner. Friday I have the whole day to myself but since I'm doing a 10 mile race the next day- I'm going to take it easy. I'm planning on going on a 3-4 mile walk just to get a little cardio in.

Happy Tuesday all- make it count!


  1. I had that same "bad run" last Thursday. I couldn't believe how strongly it affected me. It made me really nervous about my 5K on Saturday, but my 5K ended up being awesome. It's amazing what a bad run can do to you.

    I also have a belt pack that I use for my runs, but it's much smaller than that. (I just got it at Walmart) It's pretty flat, and only big enough to hold my phone, my ear buds, my key and some chapstick. I really prefer to wear it down on my hips more, but it never stays put. So I wear it at my natural waist, which feels very weird to me. It never dawned on me to turn it around and wear it on my back. But then I would have my ear buds twisted around me. I can't imagine that would work so well.

  2. You should be proud of your run because you finished and didn't give up! Even if it wasn't your best run, you didn't just stop and start walking- so I definitely think you have something to be proud about!
    I do a similar thing with pictures with my 6 month old son. Each month I take a picture of him in the same chair. In the end, I want to make a 12 picture collage of his first year. I think your 365 project sounds fun!